There’s nothing wrong with fairy tales, as long as you update the characters and devise your own happy ending.

As our plane passed over Nova Scotia last week, my son finally ran out of videos, books, toys and his general patience with traveling. To avoid the inevitable stream of “are we there yets?” I resorted to storytelling as a distraction. Much to the amusement of our fellow passengers, I regaled him with sanitized, updated versions of familiar fairy tales.

I glossed over murderous animals (how come it’s always the grandmas who are eaten by wolves or run over by reindeer?), child abandonment (what’s with all the kids being left alone in the woods?), and wicked stepparents (after all, he might eventually have one; or worse, I might someday be one!). As for “happily ever after,” in my versions, Snow White and the seven dwarfs sell their mine to a Middle Eastern conglomerate and retire to the South of France; Rapunzel launches a successful line of hair care products; and the three bears sign a contract for a “tell all” book entitled “Who’s Been Sleeping in my Bed?”

I have to admit, however, that I still have a soft spot for traditional fairy tale endings. I try to suppress it, being the modern working woman that I am, but even as recently as last fall, I thought I’d met Prince Charming. There I was in a designer gown racing barefoot down the marble steps of the Boston Public Library at midnight, when I literally run into a gentleman with enough wit to reference Cinderella. (Alas, there were no glass slippers, but brand new black stilettos; and I didn’t lose them, they were in my hand because they hurt my feet; nor was I running from the ball, but instead, racing to the bathroom. But that’s not what I was going to tell the grandkids.)

For the next week I eagerly anticipated my date with Prince Charming who happened to be a recently published novelist. Of course fairy tale endings only exist in Danielle Steele books and Meg Ryan movies, because Prince Charming without the tuxedo turned out to be more like Prince Twinkletoes. (As Seinfield would say, “not that there’s anything wrong with that.” But personally, I prefer guys that look like they could build me a house, not redecorate it.) However, recognizing that my type hadn’t exactly worked out yet, I tried to overlook the flamboyant clothing, excessive use of hair gel and the fact that he sported more jewelry than I own. Unfortunately, Twinkletoes then launched into a tortured creative artist monologue. (Check please!)

In his defense, I probably didn’t live up to my end of the fairy tale either. Not much about Cindy screams Type A personality. So perhaps it’s time to finally give up on that particular fantasy. If there really are Prince Charmings out there, I wouldn’t be the Cinderella they were seeking (I’m not real good at that damsel in distress thing). But Princess Fiona and Shrek, on the other hand, … now that’s a couple I can relate to!

Table Thought for the Week: There’s nothing wrong with fairy tales, as long as you update the characters and devise your own happy ending. Put it together and what have you got? Bibbity, bobbity, boo!

About the Author

Diane K. Danielson is a business development consultant and the co-author of Table Talk: The Savvy Girl's Alternative to Networking (1stBooks, April 2003), www.TableTalkBooks.com.